How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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