Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I can't put those talents on a resume
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
