I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
The air taste purple.
Randomize
