Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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