I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
