im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I have aggressive nipples.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
