I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
