I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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