Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
