Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
