I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
