Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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