Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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