Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
