when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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