dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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