my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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