So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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