Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
