i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
She announced her abortion via fbk
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
As shirtless as possible
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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