I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Is her dick bigger than yours?
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