he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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