I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
