Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize