I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
