Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
