And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.