After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
