Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
