Please, let me fuck your mom
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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