The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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