This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
