Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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