One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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