Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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