I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Damn victory sex feels great