Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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