great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize