wakey wakey hands off snakey
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
i now understand why vodka
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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