Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
