so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
