Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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