Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
