Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
