i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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