New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
