I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
