i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
