Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
