Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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