If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
You pole danced in your parka.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize
