but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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