I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
