If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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